Meme: Who would you have a one-to-one with?

Hi all.

Today is a blog linkup from the more emotional side of life. Inspired by the 18th anniversary of my mother losing her fight with cancer. Yes I do go on about it a lot but this year it hit me on the night before i wrote this.

I was stuck on things to say. but as asking friends what they think I had an idea. It's based on old phone adverts "who would you have a one-2-one with?" and it worked well for many here.

So I ask you all If you could have a one to one with one person in your life, you'll have 12 hours with them, then they have to go back to heaven/hell or even drifting away from your friendship again. I'm happy as long as your happy to talk about it.

Paul

Let's begin.

I'll spend my one to one with Mum. Yes. I'm a soppy fucker.

It would begin with taking the kids to school so the girls could show off their awesome nan! and while walking to the school they could talk in person, not just in spirit (she comes and sees the three kids a lot) and play about before school.

On dispatching of the kids I would take her to town, sit and talk, tell her more about TheJess and how we met and all the gossip before doing whatever she wants to while chatting and bonding some more along the way.
Eventually the day would pass and We'd go and pick the kids up so they could meet his awesome nan too.
At home I would show her the weird things I do on the internet, including the sweary stuff. I could do with a mothers telling off. That silly way to show they care would be fab!
Knowing time is running out I would cook a perfect meal of whatever she wanted and do what we should be doing. It would be manic but I hope I've done her proud for the day!
Sadly I know it'll be time to go, so. We hug kiss. Plead for a phone number or email to heaven and say my goodbyes wave her off and have another cry!

Well. That's my story. Tell me yours!

Going through miscarriage? YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

This post is a direct response to my original posting on DadzClub.

And first and foremost I'm not a counsellor. I'm just a bloke with a belly who's gone through miscarriage 4 times in the past. Mileage with my post could vary, as your experiences will also.

I originally wrote the post not thinking it would affect anyone. How wrong was I.

I've been approached by people on twitter, which I had originally mentioned on the post, PM'd on YouTube and my personal email inbox. (wow)

I never thought one post would have such an impact on the community in it's current form, showing that men are in some cases left with little support in such traumatic situations. I understand how this happens but our tough(sic) exterior does not always show what's going on inside.....

I won't lie I think about my four angels and it hurts a damned lot at times, mostly it's happy thoughts, knowing I can look in the sky, happy they are playing with my parents up in the stars, at night I see their 4 stars, brighter than any star ever to show itself off to the world.

Other times it's an emotional train wreck. Similar to the mess my mind drags me into when thinking of my parents. With time pain does die down, but will stay with you. Those little things in life will remind you about it, and you'll cry. Don't fight it. It's OK.

Guys and girls out there If you came looking for advice I'll share some. And it'll be short and sweet (I will keep updating this. I promise)

• You or your partner are not a let down of failure to each other, yourselves or your families. I promise you this now.
• It'll stop hurting, I can't say when, but it will do.
• Be there for each other, it'll make you stronger.
• Don't judge yourself or your partner this is one of the best things I can advise
• if talking to a stranger helps @hooker1uk or hooker1uk@ovi.com
• You are not alone. #TwitterHoldsYourHand #Notalone365 will be there to help you too.

I know I’m not the best person in the world to help all the time, as I’m a walking contradiction at times with my own emotions.(I’ve cried 10-15 times in writing this) But I'll always try my best to help without prejudice or judgement for anyone, regardless of who they are when going through miscarriage.

To my angels.

I love you, I know you'll have a beautiful life, I know you'll be a star. But why In somebody else's sky? Keep the 'rents smiling for me. :D

This image I created a while back says it better than I can. 

listen to this before commenting or going for a stiff drink, it works well while thinking about miscarriage, my partner and being their for her.

Stay strong,

Stay safe

Keep smiling

Paul