Monday, 21 July 2014

Remember your #PartnersToo

Morning all.

Today I'm here to chat to you about Supporting Our Partners Too, a new campaign by the miscarriage association. It's a bitter sweet post as I understand how some people need help, not the usual help but the kind when you're told you've lost a baby in miscarriage and feel lost in the mud with no escape. Now for many people we stick by our partners and try to support where we can, sometimes we don't know what to do and many feel useless or a failure, especially when you know your partner is probably feeling the same!

When the good times turn to tragedy we are usually powerless to change this and I'll admit I'm tearing up while talking about this here so rest assured it's normal for everyone!

As many who've contacted me in the past will understand miscarriage and ectopic or molar pregnancy can be one of the lowest, scary and most isolating experiences for both men and women and partners. The questions that float into your head are awful, especially ‘Why?' I'm only thankful to be able to offer my support to anyone who needs help, as for many it's extremely hard to find people who understand, who can offer support and a listening ear.

New research amongst 160 people whose partners had been through a miscarriage showed that:

Before the miscarriage the majority of partners said they felt ‘happy’, ‘excited’, ‘thrilled’ or ‘delighted’ about the pregnancy. 55% had already picked a name for their baby, over half had read a pregnancy book and a third read parenting books too.

After the loss many partners reacted with feelings of sadness (85%), grief (63%) and shock (58%). But nearly a quarter didn't share their feelings with their partner, usually for fear of upsetting her more or saying the wrong thing. Those who did share their feelings often found that it helped them both through their loss.

Also many people forget partners when Miscarriage happens, it may not be much but to be asked if your ok can make the world of difference. I promise you that.

This is why I support the amazing work of the Miscarriage Association's Partners Too Campaign to highlight the simple fact that we ALL need support in situations like these and while I can't help everyone the Association will be there to offer a shoulder to cry on and offer practical advice to those at one of the worst points anyone can experience, they can be contacted by telephone on 01924 200799

Over the course of today I'll also be here to chat with if anyone needs to. My email address is in the contact/about tab and I'll be on twitter as much as I can be too and directing help where needed the most. I only hope i can help in any way possible.

Love and Support
Paul


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